avant-teenage jesus and the jerks
Sunday, November 16th, 2025 12:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
enterthemirrorhi! short one because i am tired. been listening to lots of music. that's it. bye! avant-teen is such a shit phrase. my banner on the horizon--RYM will burn
really, though, that is the most notable thing. lotsss of new music which is fun because i was really in a rut for a while. lots of emo stuff, now! that sort of v classic 90s-early 00s stuff; i can't stand a lot of this sort of emo because the vocals often make it unbearable, but i've found a few bands with very good clean not annoying vocals. a diversion from the normal screamy stuff i'm into. i am so obsessed with some of it i almost want to share it... i don't want to. not in a gatekeeping way, but just because i don't want to ramble about it, sob.
also, i feel a little better, i think. it's slightly annoying because i went out with a friend today and he wouldn't stop commenting on like. how serious and depressed and joyhating i seemed. he wasn't being very serious and he was kinda right but also like... i don't want to come off that way! i don't like that all those things were brought up very much. i might be having weird mood swings because i find myself saying very embarrassing things and rambling way too much just as often as i find myself being all lame and emo and stuff. i also have been, like, slightly unserious about it, but i feel like i have been thinking about like violent nasty gorey killing people stuff too often. i don't often get into that sort of mood and it's like... get overrr yourself. anyways. no bad emo self harm things recently, but i do think about it every now and then. i think i can call myself "fine", though :)
things have been very confusing lately in a sort of existential way? i won't get into it because it is... confusing (duh). idk. i hope i get out of it soon because it's weird!!! i'm okay, and this time i really do feel assured in that, but i think i need to stop thinking about things a little bit. because i am currently in, like, overthinking mode. tomorrow i (hopefully) have plans to go out to town or something, but if that fails, i'll try to figure out a hike or something nature-y because i miss going out and doing nature-y things quite a bit and this cold weather is great for bundling up and doing things like that. it is unfortunate i don't know anyone with a car who is also into taking long walks in the interminable cold... bleh, i'll figure it out. okay. i am going to hush now because i'm afraid of rambling qwq. edit... because... i shouldn't constrain myself!!! i should ramble if i want to. i like the idea of a walk but i just want to get in the forest immediately. i feel like walking through town for 15 min would kill my mood very quickly. maybe i will do the charles river trail? it's for both bikes and people so i'll be fine. the only people there will be crazy athlete bike people because it'll be chilly so it'll probably be nice. i wonder how much foliage will be left! i feel like i haven't even seen pretty autumn yet. i will be going up further north soon, so we'll see if there's any pretty autumn stuff left.
also, i'm looking at my watch later and i have lots of funny videos in here i forgot all about.
riot. fuck!
i love this video. i love minette. i love the idea of a ruth etting impression (and i'm sure she did a v good one!). i want to believe i am the youngest person to laugh at a joke about the boswell sisters. i need to force people to listen to minette's music more often even if they hate it and hate me and think it's not entertaining at all.
look at me, resizing and adding images! daring, aren't i? i'll fuck up the post with all these embeds and images and things, but i'm drunk with power.
pina menichelli, who i ramble about in the next paragraph. i know exactly what i will soundtrack the (silent) movies she was in with--gnossiennes, 100%. i wish there were 10 million gnossiennes. i love them sososo much, and for some reason i always associate menichelli with them. the music in this is also satie, but it's one of the gymnopedies.
bwehhhh i had a whole paragraph here but it got deleted because EMBEDDINGGG is so hard sob. i will try to recount it. i am so not in the mood to recount it... the things i do for you, dear reader. i have had a horrible desire... TEXT BASED RP. i think you'll sympathize with the reason--lately i've had a somewhat autistic impression with turn of the century stuff; the late gilded age, the belle epoque, italian actresses (you can guess who), etc. i hope this doesn't look lame, because it really has struck me lately and i just think it's so... i don't know. i just like it a lot! i want to write about it, or at least get in that sort of mood, but i absolutely don't trust myself to do creative writing. i would only embarrass myself even if it never left me. so... i think it being a two person affair makes sense! i have still sworn off internet RP because even if i wasn't simply morally opposed i know it would go poorly. if i could invent a person, i would invent someone who will write about la belle epoque with me. also, about pina menichelli! i know i am slightly autistically obsessed and that's okay. i keep saving images of her, which i feel like i need to explain away??? i promise i'm not weird. me and some friends are going to try and get posters printed next week, and i am certainly going to put her on one. again... not in a weird way... i'm just a fan!!! it does feel like a big step towards loserdom to watch silent films in my free time... but someone has to do it. (no, they don't.) okay. i guess i didn't say anything important in the original paragraph besides this! oh, i brought up drinking water. something to the effect of "i need to drink more water." goodnight for meow :) please don't fuck up, embeds, because i'll be really sad :(
really, though, that is the most notable thing. lotsss of new music which is fun because i was really in a rut for a while. lots of emo stuff, now! that sort of v classic 90s-early 00s stuff; i can't stand a lot of this sort of emo because the vocals often make it unbearable, but i've found a few bands with very good clean not annoying vocals. a diversion from the normal screamy stuff i'm into. i am so obsessed with some of it i almost want to share it... i don't want to. not in a gatekeeping way, but just because i don't want to ramble about it, sob.
also, i feel a little better, i think. it's slightly annoying because i went out with a friend today and he wouldn't stop commenting on like. how serious and depressed and joyhating i seemed. he wasn't being very serious and he was kinda right but also like... i don't want to come off that way! i don't like that all those things were brought up very much. i might be having weird mood swings because i find myself saying very embarrassing things and rambling way too much just as often as i find myself being all lame and emo and stuff. i also have been, like, slightly unserious about it, but i feel like i have been thinking about like violent nasty gorey killing people stuff too often. i don't often get into that sort of mood and it's like... get overrr yourself. anyways. no bad emo self harm things recently, but i do think about it every now and then. i think i can call myself "fine", though :)
things have been very confusing lately in a sort of existential way? i won't get into it because it is... confusing (duh). idk. i hope i get out of it soon because it's weird!!! i'm okay, and this time i really do feel assured in that, but i think i need to stop thinking about things a little bit. because i am currently in, like, overthinking mode. tomorrow i (hopefully) have plans to go out to town or something, but if that fails, i'll try to figure out a hike or something nature-y because i miss going out and doing nature-y things quite a bit and this cold weather is great for bundling up and doing things like that. it is unfortunate i don't know anyone with a car who is also into taking long walks in the interminable cold... bleh, i'll figure it out. okay. i am going to hush now because i'm afraid of rambling qwq. edit... because... i shouldn't constrain myself!!! i should ramble if i want to. i like the idea of a walk but i just want to get in the forest immediately. i feel like walking through town for 15 min would kill my mood very quickly. maybe i will do the charles river trail? it's for both bikes and people so i'll be fine. the only people there will be crazy athlete bike people because it'll be chilly so it'll probably be nice. i wonder how much foliage will be left! i feel like i haven't even seen pretty autumn yet. i will be going up further north soon, so we'll see if there's any pretty autumn stuff left.
also, i'm looking at my watch later and i have lots of funny videos in here i forgot all about.
riot. fuck!
i love this video. i love minette. i love the idea of a ruth etting impression (and i'm sure she did a v good one!). i want to believe i am the youngest person to laugh at a joke about the boswell sisters. i need to force people to listen to minette's music more often even if they hate it and hate me and think it's not entertaining at all.
look at me, resizing and adding images! daring, aren't i? i'll fuck up the post with all these embeds and images and things, but i'm drunk with power.
pina menichelli, who i ramble about in the next paragraph. i know exactly what i will soundtrack the (silent) movies she was in with--gnossiennes, 100%. i wish there were 10 million gnossiennes. i love them sososo much, and for some reason i always associate menichelli with them. the music in this is also satie, but it's one of the gymnopedies.
bwehhhh i had a whole paragraph here but it got deleted because EMBEDDINGGG is so hard sob. i will try to recount it. i am so not in the mood to recount it... the things i do for you, dear reader. i have had a horrible desire... TEXT BASED RP. i think you'll sympathize with the reason--lately i've had a somewhat autistic impression with turn of the century stuff; the late gilded age, the belle epoque, italian actresses (you can guess who), etc. i hope this doesn't look lame, because it really has struck me lately and i just think it's so... i don't know. i just like it a lot! i want to write about it, or at least get in that sort of mood, but i absolutely don't trust myself to do creative writing. i would only embarrass myself even if it never left me. so... i think it being a two person affair makes sense! i have still sworn off internet RP because even if i wasn't simply morally opposed i know it would go poorly. if i could invent a person, i would invent someone who will write about la belle epoque with me. also, about pina menichelli! i know i am slightly autistically obsessed and that's okay. i keep saving images of her, which i feel like i need to explain away??? i promise i'm not weird. me and some friends are going to try and get posters printed next week, and i am certainly going to put her on one. again... not in a weird way... i'm just a fan!!! it does feel like a big step towards loserdom to watch silent films in my free time... but someone has to do it. (no, they don't.) okay. i guess i didn't say anything important in the original paragraph besides this! oh, i brought up drinking water. something to the effect of "i need to drink more water." goodnight for meow :) please don't fuck up, embeds, because i'll be really sad :(
no subject
Date: Sunday, 16 November 2025 07:20 pm (UTC)Text based RP.... takes a drag off my cigarette... haven't heard that name in years...
I like writing. I'll help you write if you want :D
no subject
Date: Monday, 17 November 2025 01:10 am (UTC)