neo-photo-secessionist
Thursday, January 1st, 2026 01:08 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
enterthemirror"Je remercie la tradition qui me vaut de vous souhaiter la bonne année et d’adresser un signe d’amitié à ceux qui luttent contre la société de classes et son cortège de pollutions, de répression, d’exploitation et d’aliénation, de pauvreté et de misère, d’inégalité et d’injustice..."
happy new year, dear reader! you may think me a loser for making a post instead of kissing loved ones, reveling, etc. i am simply home for the holidays and know (& can put up with) nobody here. still kinda lame... i don't know how much i've complained about my hometown on here! i will try not to do it in this message, but maybe a little will slip in. the gist--i have zero affection for it whatsoever. anyways.
so, what *am* i doing? well, i've been making myself read. i've been in an okay mood and went out earlier today for the first time in probably a week or so. it was nice. my attention span feels a little shot which is annoying. it doesn't help that i'm trying to read endnotes, but... i find it very comprehensible so far. actually kinda enjoyable! i don't know why i'm having difficulty reading... bleh. i want to smoke so bad jfc. when i am in montreal (if i have my ID by then ((i am getting an ID finally (((yes, i don't have an ID)))))) i will buy cigarettes even if they have grisly photos on them. *especially* if they have grisly photos on them!!! anyways. endnotes is great if not a little discouraging. like... when reading it, everything they say feels so incredibly obvious and yet i don't know anybody politically minded who feels similarly. i guess i know one person but i haven't spoken to her in months and i don't even know how i would strike up a conversation. i don't even know, like... how i would run into her in real life. we are not friends, simply, but i would like to be friends. even just for the sake of talking about politics.
i'm just on the first endnotes edition and it seems fairly long and i'm reading relatively slow compared to how quick i used to be... i just hope i finish this. i'll read this one and then hopefully circle back to that Dauvé book? Dauvé has a very long essay in this edition, so i don't really see it as avoiding his book, just better prepping myself to understand it. it already makes a lot of sense from what i've read, but there have been a few bits even in the little bit of endnotes i've read that have increased my understanding of Dauvé. i'm really interested in it so far and want to keep going. i don't know how i'm going to interact with the non ultra-gauche after this sort of thing, though, sob. this is just reinforcing everything i already believe and i fear i only get will get more annoying about it. i need to be more well-read so i can be a more insufferable, uncompromising leftist. i'll be a communard irregular like Rimbaud. i'll be recognized next to toppled statues #LARP
^ soon to be me.
anyways. tired. i don't know how badly i want to read. i should... maybe i need fiction or something. later, though. i will finish endnotes first. while i was out and while i have been reading i hardly thought about suicide at all which is good!! listening to fursaxa. i already put that in the music text box thingy but i do love her. can't believe i didn't think to put fursaxa on yet. her & that scandinavian musician woman whatever her name is are both good. it's like... kuupi or something dumb. good music though. i looked it up it's *kuupuu*. come on!!! it really is good music but what the fuck is that. okay. i have been watching lots of jerma lately. he makes me happy meow meow meow. bleh now i feel sad all of a sudden as soon as i brought up jerma qwq why did that happen????? okay my wrist hurts from typing owww. i'm going to pause reading and watch jerma to make me feel better. love you dear reader. i love my girlfriend. goodnight for meow dear reader :)
happy new year, dear reader! you may think me a loser for making a post instead of kissing loved ones, reveling, etc. i am simply home for the holidays and know (& can put up with) nobody here. still kinda lame... i don't know how much i've complained about my hometown on here! i will try not to do it in this message, but maybe a little will slip in. the gist--i have zero affection for it whatsoever. anyways.
so, what *am* i doing? well, i've been making myself read. i've been in an okay mood and went out earlier today for the first time in probably a week or so. it was nice. my attention span feels a little shot which is annoying. it doesn't help that i'm trying to read endnotes, but... i find it very comprehensible so far. actually kinda enjoyable! i don't know why i'm having difficulty reading... bleh. i want to smoke so bad jfc. when i am in montreal (if i have my ID by then ((i am getting an ID finally (((yes, i don't have an ID)))))) i will buy cigarettes even if they have grisly photos on them. *especially* if they have grisly photos on them!!! anyways. endnotes is great if not a little discouraging. like... when reading it, everything they say feels so incredibly obvious and yet i don't know anybody politically minded who feels similarly. i guess i know one person but i haven't spoken to her in months and i don't even know how i would strike up a conversation. i don't even know, like... how i would run into her in real life. we are not friends, simply, but i would like to be friends. even just for the sake of talking about politics.
i'm just on the first endnotes edition and it seems fairly long and i'm reading relatively slow compared to how quick i used to be... i just hope i finish this. i'll read this one and then hopefully circle back to that Dauvé book? Dauvé has a very long essay in this edition, so i don't really see it as avoiding his book, just better prepping myself to understand it. it already makes a lot of sense from what i've read, but there have been a few bits even in the little bit of endnotes i've read that have increased my understanding of Dauvé. i'm really interested in it so far and want to keep going. i don't know how i'm going to interact with the non ultra-gauche after this sort of thing, though, sob. this is just reinforcing everything i already believe and i fear i only get will get more annoying about it. i need to be more well-read so i can be a more insufferable, uncompromising leftist. i'll be a communard irregular like Rimbaud. i'll be recognized next to toppled statues #LARP
^ soon to be me.
anyways. tired. i don't know how badly i want to read. i should... maybe i need fiction or something. later, though. i will finish endnotes first. while i was out and while i have been reading i hardly thought about suicide at all which is good!! listening to fursaxa. i already put that in the music text box thingy but i do love her. can't believe i didn't think to put fursaxa on yet. her & that scandinavian musician woman whatever her name is are both good. it's like... kuupi or something dumb. good music though. i looked it up it's *kuupuu*. come on!!! it really is good music but what the fuck is that. okay. i have been watching lots of jerma lately. he makes me happy meow meow meow. bleh now i feel sad all of a sudden as soon as i brought up jerma qwq why did that happen????? okay my wrist hurts from typing owww. i'm going to pause reading and watch jerma to make me feel better. love you dear reader. i love my girlfriend. goodnight for meow dear reader :)
