did you know the real Shirley Temple found her namesake mocktail too sweet?

bleh it is not going amazing. feel like a moth pinned to a corkboard right now. i hate the idea of staying in this room any longer but i know the only alternative is hanging around in a building where i know i could hang myself whenever i want. sooo . . . idk. blehhghfhh. i feel like i'm getting worse at talking and being social and even just *understanding* social things, too!! idkidkidk. i'm not going to do anything bad but it is really appealing right now. my head hurts and my roommate is on the phone and the lights are on and i need to do something but everything i can think of will result in bad things. tomorrow i am going to go out and try to buy a new pair of pants which is better than stabbing people or killing myself <3 i do really want some new pants. i only have one pair of pants i really wear, and they're nice, but i could certainly do better. ok. i'm going to shut up soon. i want to watch a movie so badly but i feel unable to. all i want right now is an ibuprofen and a shirley temple and self harm and an orgasm and a movie in a dark room on a nice screen. i can do like... three of those things? i won't partake in any of them. goodbye for meow :)